Tired again today...

A came over past midnight after drinking with some of her friends. She needed to get laid. We didn't spend much time talked and it was better than most times.

I was telling her I'd breed her, keep her pregnant and everytime she'd feel the baby in her or look at her new child she'd think of me forcing her down until I filled her up. I was, like, romantic and shit.

At one pointed things got so heated that my hand was slamming into her after I'd finished. She was voiceless, naked, heard rolling to the wall, her lips opened and stretched. Her hand went to mine and held it as her body convulsed.

Then...a fluid flowed heavily. As I watched, it gushed with a squishing sound flowing into my cupped fingers. It was yellow-orange-amber with tiny tendrils of blood within. I was afraid I'd hurt her. Things had been getting rough and I'm sure I did.

Afterwards she lay one the bed, naked breathing quietly, neither of us saying anything. I'd never seen a woman ejaculate before. It drenched by sheets and left a diffused red against the mattress giving it a suspicious look.

Working quickly, we managed to rub it out with detergent and fell asleep at four in the morning on a bare, very fresh smelling mattress.

Lack of sleep is catching up to me now.

I got a video ipod. I've been thinking about it in my head, going back and forth if I will or won't. I shouldn't, I already have one and I'm trying to save money but with this job and the other one and the first one if that doesn't work out, things are looking better fanancially.

Finished Zombie. Not sure what I'll read next.

I've still on a very positive high. I can't shake the feeling that everything is going better than I could have hoped and everything is great. It's an odd feeling for me, I'm not used to it at all.

I got a video ipod. I've been thinking about it in my head, going back and forth if I will or won't. I shouldn't, I already have one and I'm trying to save money but with this job and the other one and the first one if that doesn't work out, things are looking better fanancially.

Right now I'm infatuated with it. I like the idea of having a collection of movies and every song I could ever want wherever I go. Very unnecessary but I love it. Growing up I would have thought that wouldn't be around in my lifetime. We don't think about it but ipods are a big jump in technology. Odds are we've made a lot of huge jumps in medicine and weaponry that only a few know about but this is for everyone. The future, man...

I had to name it when I hooked it up to iTunes and since I already had one named my Ipod I named this one The Widowmaker and it is. Damn....

Just finished



Just Started



Stiff was a good one. A suggested it for me, I guess she knows me pretty well in the short time we've been together. All about dead bodies and what they do with them after they've been donated. Chopped up, used as fertilizer, put in fields to rot, harvested, hung on crosses, frozen and put in museums, yum!

Zombie is the daily thoughts of a sex offender/murderer as he goes through his life. His mind works differently than other people's. He's more observant but he's sociopathic, delusional and paranoid. Actually pretty creepy book but it's written so simply, like the main character and his simple thoughts.

Been itching to get a video ipod lately. Been thinking about it far too much.

Someone once said Chicago is like an abusive lover. It beats you down over and over again in the winter and you fall in love with it and forget all your complaints when spring hits. A said the weather on Sunday is like the wind making out with you.

It was one of those perfect days, the kind that triggers your sense when you smell a hint of fresh leaves and the pure, fresh air that seems so rare. There was a barbecue, an incredible barbecue with friends and those I never met. I spent two days with them, played with kids in the park, petted unknown dogs and thought it was the perfect day to blast the Ramones out an open window. Summer is always the best time for the Ramones; hot, sweaty and sun baked days with hours spent just as you'd like.

That will come later. Now I'm just enjoying the great mood the weather has got everyone in.

Spent the weekend with A again. Saw Macabre on Friday and had fun but it didn't live up to my hopes. I'm getting really close to her, which took me by surprise. I didn't think I would. In fact I didn't think I would know her for more than a month. Now I'd be shocked if I didn't know her last year.

Sunday made me think about everything, how I feel completely different than I did even three months ago. I wish I could meet me last summer. We'd have a lot to talk about. He'd probably think I was bullshitting.

It's been difficult getting things organized lately. I hate planning too much in advance, I'd rather have my life unscripted so I don't often make plans until a day or two before.
Add to that the fact that there are two women that both want my time equally. I never thought this would happen, I usually don't have such luck but I don't want to lose either of them. Granted, I like one more than the other but I hate the idea of letting one down or ignoring her. I'm doing my best to schedule my time with each as much as possible.
A is getting most of my time. I spend the most time with her by far. When I want to go somewhere or do something I think of her. We've already talked this weekend and scheduled the entire time together.
Je, who I thought would have lost interest considering I hardly ever see her, wants to see me whenever I have time. The problem is when I have time I'm usually recuperating.
That and I usually see C whenever she calls. She doesn't call too often but when she does I see her. Yesterday afternoon I spent looking at new apartments and running errands with her. At the end of the month I'd promised to help her move.
I'm trying to get her to move into Ukranian Village because that's where A lives and where I will most likely move when the planets align. It would make everything just more damn convenient than one living way up north and the other living in the south.

I feel like I have to book people in advance to see them. I'm still not sure how this happened. Months ago I was spending my weekends home alone playing video games and wondering if I made such a good choice moving here.

Going to see Macabre tomorrow night. They're one of the reasons I moved here. They rarely play anywhere outside the Midwest.

Got tickets to see Type O Negative the second week of April. I've seen them a few times in Boston but have been in the mood to see them again. They've got a great new CD that I've got to pick up.


Scary looking bastards

I used to have a huge dvd collection. I had so many that it was unwieldy, I had to plan when I moved them and forgot which ones I had and didn't have. Most of them were lost in the fire this summer and since I've been slowly looking for them.
The best part about it isn't watching them but looking for them in stores and finding rare, out of print movies to add to my collection. It's the same as shoppers looking for discounts or bargains. It had gotten to be a problem and was a little relieved that I was able to get rid of (and sell a few) dvds in one fell swoop.

Now I'm starting to miss having certain movies around. I could have gotten rid of at least as many as I lost without a problem but I wasn't able to pick which ones. One in particular I would have kept.



One of my favorite movies is Hard Boiled starring Chow Yun Fat. Since it was one of my favorite movies I had to have the best copy made. The problem was the best copy was long out of print and I had to go on eBay to get it. I got it at a hefty price but it was worth it, it's a great movie. It was the one movie I really regretted losing in the fire. I know it would be a lot of effort and money to get it again.



The Killer is another movie from the same director with the same actor and since it is harder to find and thought to be a better movie it is even more expensive. My copy of The Killer didn't burn.

I'm starting to get dvds again though I don't plan to have nearly as many as I once did. It's only going to be a collection of my favorites and some others I really like.

I'm writing this because I just found the copy of Hard Boiled that I've been looking for so I only have a few left that I want.

The last ones on my list;

Almost Famous
Devil's Rejects
Hell House
House of 1,000 Corpses
Jesus Camp
Kill Bill
Kill Bill Vol. 2
The Story of Ricky
Twelve Monkeys
Vanishing Point


If you haven't seen these I would recommend all of them (except Jesus Camp which I haven't seen yet)

I've been told the belief that it rains a lot in Seattle is a myth. You just feel like it does, it doesn't rain anymore there than it does anywhere else. After spending A few days there, with the sky overcast and/or raining almost the entire time I have to believe that's bullshit.
That's their winter, I've been told. It doesn't snow and doesn't get cold, it just rains. And stays overcast. For months. The people there are very progressive, very green and seem to keep to their own city. A lot of money has been made in the area, first through timber and those people eager to exploit their natural resources, then Microsoft and Starbucks. The first Starbucks is there and getting a drink there isn't the stigma it seems to be everywhere else. The insanely rich geeks that built Microsoft have a tendency to put it back- much of the city has been renovated by Paul Allen, one of the founders who has also built a computer science building for the University of Washington, as well as building the Experience Music Project, a museum of music (mostly Jimi Hendrix) memorabilia and a place to show off Microsoft's new gadgets.
They are proud of their music scene. Like most of the city, it's quaint just as it was before it was exploited by mtv and cultural trends. It's gone back to the humble path it was on fifteen years ago. Admittedly, I didn't have a chance to explore it as much as I'd like. Four days doesn't allow a proper listen.
Out of all this I have to say I've never seen a whiter city. There are much less minorities here than elsewhere and the ones that are seem separate from the rest of the population.



Grade: A-

Hope you like coffee and having a cold six months out of the year. It would help if you have a computer degree of some sort as well.

Don't forget to recycle.