Strange how things look so different once they're behind you. I miss Boston, not all of it and I don't want to go back but I find myself thinking back to that city. I miss South Boston because things seemed so much simpler then. I remember having a lot of shit to deal with there so it wasn't all that different, it was tighter and familiar. I still feel like a stranger here. I probably will be for a while. I'm still washing the taste of KT out of my mouth.

I hate what's happened to C. Maybe during the week away in Maine she got used to not having me around and hasn't shown much interest in bringing me back into her life. We left on great terms and I believe she's been busy but the two times we've talked it seemed like even talking with me was a chore. We made plans for sometime this week but only as an afterthought. I'm not sure if it will ever happen.

We weren't dating and I know she sees several people, I just realized how much I enjoyed having her in my life. So many people around her are these emotionally different or broken people that they take up so much of her attention. I don't feel near what I used to so maybe I'm not that important anymore.
For a while it was just her and I and then people started to slowly creep in. I miss her. I want to see her again.